你就是我的心跳

ytd, i heard from my mentor that there will be an internal audit nx wk and the auditors are coming on nx monday!!!!! they will have to inspect our lab lor. so 2day n tml will be a veri busy day for mi n my mentor liao. coz we 2day juz cleared the 2 fridges in our lab for the expired reagent. it filled up the whole biohazard bag for ur info okay? its so much n so heavy. den i need to check all the files n documents to make sure that they are in place. i filpped through a total of 4 files which each of them contains 500 lab request form(LRF). i filpped till my hands ache n check till my eye pain lor.

so much things left for us to complete tml lor. hope tml will not have alot of samples or specimens. if not, i dun think we can finish all the stuff by tml. have to clear up all the mess in the lab n tidy it up nicely before we leave tml. guess im prepared to do OT tml already. but btw, im not paid for doing OT. but no choice, have to. coz the audit in on monday liao.

hope i can finish everything by tml.
wish mi gd luck!!!

• 11.03pm

2day heard an extremely bad news @ ard 11am when i reach the endoscopy to collect specimen. my mentor when to see if there is any specimens to collect for testing. den she asked mi to walk over to her side n look at the LRF(laboratory request form), i was stunned to see the test: fecal pH!!!!!!!!!! argh. den we cant find that specimen on the tray, so we went to the vet's office to ask him for it. he said that he placed it on the tray in a glove!!! den we went back to endoscopy to look for that faeces, but it was not there and we ask all the personnel there they didnt see it or might have threw it away. we called the doctor again n guess wat he says? he said: den u guys have to go to the stables and collect it!!!!! i was shocked to hear that!!! meaning that we will have to go collect the faeces ourselves.

so SWAY lor. got fecal de specimen already veri SWAY liao, somemore still lose that specimen.

so no choice, we went to the stable. on the way, my mentor, who is my senior, she ask mi to be a gentleman and do it, so i guess i have no choice but to do it. upon reaching the stable, we ask for the horse to collect the faeces. the trainer was so gd that he collected it on my behalf and handed mi that. so grateful to him lor

den aft that proceeded back to lab to do the test. now the lab stinks like hell lor. hope it will be gone by tml.

it still a fun learning experience though. enjoyed my internship in STC so far :)

• 10.44pm

2day is my 1st day of SIP @ the turf club. the only word that i can use is great!!!!!! coz 2day i learned quite lot of stuffs in the lab from my mentor, who hppns to be an ex TP student in the same course as mi. she juz gratuated lor. i get to learn how to run control samples, data entering and different tests procedures using the analyzers. N 2day i get to do the full blood count using the analyzer 2day lor!!!!!!!!!! following all the test den i was asked to do data entry into the LIS and print the report. the report were later sent to the vets for review n signature.

she also brings mi to the endoscopy department to meet all the vets and introduce them to mi 1 by 1 and they were all ANG MO's lor. i cant see an asian vet there. i cant seens to rmb all their names but i'll try my best to. n i get to speak to a vet as he came to our lab 2day. i saw him extracting all the serum from the blood tubes using a syringe, so i asked him why is he doing this. he told mi that actually this is used to treat the horse's (same horse from blood drawn) eye as it hurts its cornea. he said that the serum is actually good for healing of eye injuries. thats really a learning point.

overall it was a wonderful 1st day @ turf club as i get to see many horses and meet many ppl.ppl there are nice, friendly n helpful towards mi as a intern, esp my mentor. she is really patient. although she had many things to complete on a monday morning, she drove mi (using a buggy) around to familarise with the environment and teach mi step by step each of the procedures of each test.

hope that each day will be a fun learning experience for mi @ turf club :)

• 10.37pm

今天下午2点，我准时地在越好的地方等你，但却迟迟没见你来的踪影。我等到差不多要快5点，你始终都没有来，看来你是还没有原谅我的样子。但没关系，我说过，我能等你10个礼拜，也许我就能等你10个月，甚至是10年，等到你会原谅我为止。

过后我就索性买了一张戏票，看了一场5.30pm的电影，blood, the last vampire。过后在自己一个人闲逛了街，买了两件衣服给自己当作生日礼物。今天我逛过的街，走过的路，都是我们曾经一起牵着手走过的。回忆都一幕幕的出现在我脑海里，是甜美的，但我的心情不是。已经63天，9个礼拜了，你还是深深地刻在我心底，没法放得下你。

tml will be my 1st day of attachment. anxious yet worried about it. hope nth will go wrong tml.

此刻就只能献上这一首歌: 温岚的 '祝我生日快乐'

我知道伤心不能改变什么
那么让我诚实一点
诚实难免有不能控制的宣泄
只有关上了门不必理谁

#一个人坐在空荡包厢里面
手机让它休息一夜
那上千个切掉回忆的画面
眼泪不能流过十二点

*生日快乐 我对自己说
蜡烛点了 寂寞亮了
生日快乐 泪也融了
我要谢谢你给的
你拿走的一切

还爱你 带一点恨
还要时间 才能平衡
热恋伤痕 画面重生
祝我生日快乐

重复#*

• 11.31pm
  

还剩下倒数的几分钟就是我的生日了，今年应该会和往年没什么差，也是自己过。但是我希望明天下午的2点，我会在那里见到你。我不知道你会不会出现，但我还是会在那儿等。因为如果你真的出现的话，我想会是我19年来过得最有意义的生日，你的出现也将会是我最大的礼物。

recently i've found a poem on a webside which i think its rather nice n sweet.

its named The Furthest Distance in the world:

The furthest distance in the world
Is not the distance between life and death
But you don't know I love you when I stand in front of you

The furthest distance in the world
Is not you don't know I love you when I stand in front of you
But I cannot say I love you when I love you so madly

The furthest distance in the world
Is not I cannot say I love you when I love you so madly
But I can only bury it in my heart despite the unbearable yearning

The furthest distance in the world
Is not I can only bury it in my heart despite the unbearable yearning
But we cannot be together when we love each other

The furthest distance in the world
Is not we cannot be together when we love each other
But we pretend caring nothing even we know love is unconquerable

The furthest distance in the world
Is not the distance between two trees
But the branches cannot depend on each other in wind even they grow from the same root

The furthest distance in the world
Is not the branches cannot depend on each other
But two stars cannot meet even they watch each other

The furthest distance in the world
Is not the track between two stars
But nowhere to search in a tick after two tracks join

The furthest distance in the world
Is not nowhere to search in a tick
But doomed not to be together before they meet

The furthest distance in the world
Is the distance between fish and bird
One is in the sky, another is in the sea

The furthest distance in the world
Is not But using one's indifferent heart
To dig an uncrossable river
For the one who loves you

• 11.56pm

i been to E!hub 2day n it has been so long since i last went there. went there for bowling and movie. talk abt the bowling 1st. E!hub the bowling centre was great and i can say my scores 2day is the most presentable as compared to the past few wks. had an avg of 148 in 6 games. my partner was also not bad okay. her top game was 172!!!! higher den mine okay :( mine was onli 170... but i did contribute some effort in that game. her game was clean for the 1st 4 frames until the 5th frame when she had a 5-10 split, i offered help for that frame n spared that split. overall bowling was satisfying.

nx was the movie. went to watch 'ghost of girlfriends' past'. show was nice, meaningful n touching? i guess in the end. haha. and before parting n heading home, she handed mi a birthday gift which i didnt expect it at all. its really out of a sudden and such a surprise. thks so much for that. i cant rmb when is the last time i recieve a gift for my birthday.

a sentence quoted in the movie: some1 says 'the power of the relationship will goes to the party that cares less abt the relationship but power isnt equal to happiness, happiness often belongs to the party that cares more'. i believe thats veri true. although i know i have none out of the 2, but i really felt happy when im with her n care alot abt her everything. even if she finds them irritating now, i wont stop caring abt her. coz i know i love her. at least for now, i know my feelings for u haven changed at all. miss u lots

4 more pathetic days to my birthday. will i get to see u on that day? will u be there?

• 11.48pm

2day is the day that i didnt not get to stay at home for the whole 24hrs which i did for the past 4-5days. went to jurong point for the movie 'night at the museum 2' with my frens 2day, the movie was super nice n hilarious lar. enjoy that so much. so looking forward to 'transformers 2' to show which is on the 24th of june.

on my way to jurong point 2 day, as i got plenty of time, i took the bus 187 all the way from woodlands to boonlay. prefer taking bus than trains as i get to have some sightseeing along the journey. when the bus was reaching 'ur' place, i'll tend to look out of the window to see if i'll catch the sight of u. sadly but expected, i did not. it brought back alot of memories between u n mi on that bus coz that is the bus which i always take to ur hse to fetch u for our outing. on the way back, i took the train as it was rather late. i did a veri silly thing. which is to alight at the station stated NS4 where im not suppose to alight. i tot if i will be so 巧to be able to meet u there. i waited for 2 trains on either sides b4 it come to my mind, y am i here? wat am i doing here? i took the nx train n left for NS9 which is the stop that im suppose to alight n headed home.

• 10.44pm

sry for so long not updating. coz there is nth much to update anyway. holidays have been such a boring wan. for the 1st wk, almost everyday eat, slp, watch tv consecutively for 7 days. unlike the past when my holidays with u by my side. everyday will be a different day. i'll try to make plans for an outing with u. but now, its totally different. everyday seems so dead to mi. nth to look forward to. 这几天，连吃饭也显得没什么味口，菜也显得没什么味道。for mi, life juz seems so meaningless nowadays. im juz like 活一天，是一天。和行尸走肉没什么分别。

说长不长，说短不短。没有你的日子，55天就这样子过去了。都一直没有你的消息，我不知道你最近过得怎么样，还好吗。msn上不见你，msg你也没回复，打电话给你也没人接。你就在这世界上消失了吗？我和第1天一样，依然好想好想你，完全放不下你。

• 10.18pm

finally, its the end of a stressful wk coz term test is over!!!!! this term test i believe its going to be veri bad. i foresee i'll fail at least 2 papers for this term test out of the 5. but dun have to worry, coz i dun have to see those lecturers anymore for at least the nx 20wks, coz im going for my SIP, meaning i wont get back my papers soon. this saves mi frm a heart attack. finally can enjoy for the nx 2 wks b4 my SIP begins on the 22nd this month.

but i know the holidays this time is not going to be like the previous wan, coz u r not going to be there for mi anymore. n it have been 47 days already yet i still cant accept it that u have left mi. i really dunno wat im thinking now. n really dunno wat m i going to do for the rest of the 2 wks. if u were here, i would have plenty of plans up ahead with u. but onli if u were here. 2 more wks de sunday will be my bdae ler. will u be there ma?

i still miss u alot.

• 1.16am

as wat i have expected, 2day is my doom's day. MMIC was really indeed hell lor. open-book test are not easy. coz u know wat? most of the ans cant be found on the book itself de lor. so applicational lah!!! flip like hell oso cant find wan. so most of it i'll usually use my common sense to ans it or i'll juz crap n write bullshit. i think the lecturer marking my paper will vomit blood lor. den i'll get back a paper not white but red in colour, coz stained with his blood!!! i dun really expect much for this paper. total marks is 50. any marks above 25 will be a bonus to mi already.

tml is blood bank. got 6 topics tested lor!!!!! i have juz finish 3 and damn tired liao. will have to continue the rest tml. test is at 5 pm tml.

going to slp now liao. wish mi gd luck. dun wish to see another MMIC paper tml!!!

• 11.00pm

2day was the 1st paper for term test n it was hematology. the lecture hall that the paper was held its god damn cold lah!!!! can freeze inside wan lor. n i didnt bring along a jacket, so no choice but to tahan for the whole duration which is 75mins. the paper is from 11-12.15pm. the paper was alrite, all application qns, but to be fair to the lecturer, the paper is not tough, its manageable. i finish the paper at ard 11.30am. but i saw no 1 leaving the hall so i dare not leave. so i juz stay at my seat n read through my paper. onli until 1145 that i cant tahan the freeze inside the hall that i juz stand up n walk out of the hall

thk god 1st paper was alrite. not much of a problem. but tml is the big problem liao. medical microbiology!!! although that paper is open-book, but i still dunno wat n how to study for tat. n my textbook is more than 800 over pages. so i predict tml i'll flip my book like hell to take reference lor... the paper is onli 70mins. confirm not enough time de lor according to the seniors who had taken open-book test as flipping through the book will take quite alot of time. tml sure die de!!! its juz a matter of time. pray for mi that tml i wont die too badly.